The Gift of Enough
“More, more, more” is our society’s mantra. We aspire to do more, have more, be more. And while a growth mindset is often inspiring and invigorating, it can also become…
Resilient Mindset
Resiliency is the capacity of a substance “to spring back into shape after bending, stretching, or being compressed.” Though devastating circumstances or upsetting world events might leave us feeling flattened…
Gratitude as an Antidote to Craving
The season of indulgence has begun. If you received trick-or-treaters at your home, then you may still have leftover candy tempting you. Thanksgiving offers a delicious feast, served up with…
How to Develop Your Joyspan
I was surprised to realize recently that it’s been 10 years this month since I published Optimistic Aging: from Midlife to the Good Life. It’s been a delight to connect…
The Joy of Flocking
Fawning is a trauma reaction where we placate a threatening person in hopes of defusing their aggression. Let’s add this F to our existing list of defensive maneuvers: fight, flee…
Post-Traumatic Growth
After serving for decades as a trauma therapist, I confess that many platitudes about tragedy irk me. I don’t believe the declaration that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.…
Practice Self-Compassion
Imagine that a dear friend calls you in distress. How would you respond? What would you say? What would your tone of voice sound like? Now, consider how you talk…
Finding Everyday Awe
When a book title promises to change my life, I’m always skeptical. But that’s exactly what happened after I read psychologist Dacher Keltner’s Awe: The New Science of Wonder and…
Emotional Challenge Zones
We’ve all had the experience of losing our composure in the face of intense stress. Maybe you got defensive and lashed out at your partner during an argument. Or maybe…
The 90-Second Rule of Emotion
Neuroscientist Jill Bolte Taylor concluded that the physiological activation of emotion only lasts about 90 seconds. But what we do during that minute and a half determines if the feelings…